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This whole monstruousity was originally conveived February through March 2001 by the members of The Big Note - a Frank Zappa YahooGroup. After an arduous gestation period, this site was birthed on April 11 2001. True to the essence of collaborative effort, these people are held responsible.

All content:
© TheBigNote 2001-2004
unless specified otherwise.
Speed will turn you into your parents.


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If FZ & SOFA be jammin' In Hebbin

I recently acquired two new CD's of classical ensembles performing Zappa's work. The first is "Prophetic Attitude" by Le Concert Impromptu & Rossini. The second is "Music by Frank Zappa" by the Omnibus Wind Ensemble.
Both are quite good, but the second one seems to take far greater chances in the interpretation of Zappa's music. I have listened to all of it, but only to parts of it with any concentration. Highlights I have noted so far include Inca Roads, which has a very slow and jazzy opening segment, and Brown Shoes Don't Make It. What I found most interesting about BSDMI is the fact that this is the first time I have ever heard it performed completely as an instrumental. It forces you to consider the melodies of the piece more directly than before. This CD also includes the Ensemble's arrangement of Ravel's Bolero at the end, which segues directly from Peaches En Regalia.
Does anyone know if Zappa ever recorded BSDMI as an instrumental?
I also have a question concerning a few pieces included on the CD's that I have never heard of, and would like to know if anyone can tell me if they were ever released by FZ. This may only be a case of faulty memory on my part. On "Prophetic Attitude" there is "Wind Quintet" and "Number 6." On "Music by Frank Zappa" there is "No. 7." Anyone heard of these pieces?

I have the Omnibus disc and like it a lot. It's on heavy rotation in the CD player in my bedroom. It has Bald-Headed John's Seal of PLOOKING APPROVAL.
I was wondering the same questions about the tracks on there and the last track on the Ed Palermo disc - Wai, Fn? For a complete list of my musical Seal of PLOOKING APPROVAL just ask and I will be sure to share.
Bald Headed John (King of the Plookers)

I checked Russo's book on released and unreleased songs - none of these titles appear. I can answer BHJ and say that Ed Palermo wrote "wai, fn?"; it's the only non-Zappa tune on the disk. As for the others mentioned above, it would take some serious digging - and maybe still no answer.
According to several texts, Frank left many unperformed music scores when he went, especially pieces realized on synclavier.
The same premise is most likely true for Brown Shoes. Because there are so many musical themes that take place in the song and since Frank had no problem in borrowing themes from one piece to create another, I would say it's possible (and quite likely) that snippets of Brown Shoes exist in instrumental form. But I've no knowledge of a release of Brown Shoes as an instrumental.
Good questions...


Hey everybody,
My machine took a dump last night - I don't know how serious it is yet, but I may be down a while. I don't have Internet access at work (e-mail only) unless I use an unauthorized port (like I am now). If you could forward - or CC - any pertinent posts to me at work, I would appreciate it. Otherwise, my secondary address as listed in my profile will work also.
BHJ! Please send the Jeopardy stuff to the work address, so I can continue play.
Poodle, I received nothing negative on pogen's LG; sign 'im up!

Hallowed Greetings, Fellow Fen,
To try to help make up for the lack of SOFA's dazzling presence while he is computationally indisposed, I've created a "bonus" poll for you all to try your hand at. It's been a while since I've done this, so please accept my apologies in advance if I've made the question either too easy or too hard.
Good luck!

Enter your vote today! Check out the new poll for the THEBIGNOTE group:
What song did Zappa play with Pink Floyd at the Amougies Festival in Belgium in 1969?
a) Astronomy Dominie
b) Interstellar Overdrive
c) Up the Khyber
d) Lucifer Sam
e) Louie Louie

To try to help make up for the lack of SOFA's dazzling presence while he is computationally indisposed
(Flash to scene of 14th century England. John Cleese is carrying a fat, normally floating, SOFA down the street. The SOFA occasionally mutters, "I'm not dead yet")


This was attached to the bottom of a piece of spam I received today... Can this be my new zappnick?
I expect you all to learn to pronounce it, there will be a test on Monday. (Hint: it's pronounced just like it smells.) And for extra credit, is this:
a) a breed of tropical fish
b) a bread mold
c) my pet name for my ... um ... member
d) complete bullshit
e) all of the above

Can this be my new zappnick?
It could be, I suppose, but would you want it so??? I wouldn't! Not that phrase, no sir!
You expect us to believe that you found this at the bottom of some prepared luncheon meat? How odd... I'd write the company. Sometimes complaints like that can get you a whole bunch of free product!
Like once, my Gramma found a preserved fly in a can of Del Monte Cling Peaches (in heavy syrup). She wrote the folks at Del Monte, and complained about what she'd found. 4 - 6 weeks later, not only did she receive a check for the entire purchase price of the product (only 17 cents, but it was the 60's when 17 cents meant something), but she received 6 cases of Del Monte Cling Peaches (in heavy syrup)! Gramma died in 1987. I'm still eating those goddamned peaches.
I expect you all to learn to pronounce it
Well, being a student of Serbo-Croatian literature, I can pronounce it easily. Remember that in Eastern Block countries, often times not all letters represent spoken sound. In this case, the term is pronounced "ear-ten-whip-dogger" - which translates to English as "cum-encrusted gutter snipe". I suppose that's an okay zappnick, but I'd keep it kinda quiet if I were you.
Considering the evidence I've provided above, I would have to guess that the correct answer is "C".
But this could be a trick question...

My Dear Portly Maroon Friend, the literal translation - according to my Blow-Jays Thesaurus (purchased at Ralph's Thesaurorama - Where Words are Half Price) - is, "Come-Drunk-Gutter-Slut".
I hope the clarification provides you with the kind of feeling you only get with flannel seat covers, or flatulent fat guys.
Yours in poly-lingual rapture, I remain,
Uncle Herman

I ran this word through an online secret code breaking program, using the keyword "zappa," and it tells me that what this really means is:
BPIBOKDKPGHQPFKGAAGKBDGNGJKBPBSGBPMKUBPVG (Note the portion near the middle where it sounds like someone's choking on someone). I leave the rest of the deciphering to my fellow fen.
A Jumping Poodle Award goes to the first correct decoder of the above message.
Thanks for your patience.

Ok, now I put my fingers on the screen... I can feel it... oh... that's... it's coming out....
"ZAPPA IS A FUQKING WAY OF LIFE" isn't it so? (at least better than panty sniffing)

Says who?

DRagonfy, you are CORRECT!
PS You forgot to decode my PS…

I know, but that wasn't considered in the deal. I got paid, that's it. I would do it for another one, but I don't think I personally need one more of God's third mistake. (Or should I donate it to the poor or homeless?)


Hey, Boys and Girls! Any of you know what a Double-Dactyl is? No, it's not a laxative for a lazy Saturday afternoon. It's strict poem-form and I've written one. A friend of mine belongs to an email list where they've declared Friday "Poetry Day", which, considering that the list is for Quark XPress users, makes me think Quark is a strange program.
Anyway, she (my friend) said someone on the list suggested writing double-dactyls, and asked me if I'd ever heard of them. Well, I hadn't had the pleasure, but I did a little research online and found out how you write a one. And then I wrote one.
Why should I think any of this would interest any of you, my fellow Zappanatics? Well, here's the little gem I wrote, maybe you'll understand after reading it:
Flubbadee Blubbadee, Greggory Peccary
a fictional man that Zappa supplied.
Looked like a piggy with Respectability
Defined by the wearing of big wide white ties

OK, here's a quick one, not really technically correct:
Illinois silly boy, Enema Bandit,
he carried a bag with a hose on his arm.
"Just what they needed," he softly conceded,
sneaking around there from farm to farm.

Hyuk, hyuk.. Very witty. If you want to go further with this stuff, here's a link that may set you in the right direction: These double-dactyl thingies aren't the stuff dreams is made of, they're more like that stuff freckles lets out once a mumf....

Frank Zappa

More Amusing Musings?