Love You If You Don't Like My Hat!

The following thread was snatched off of yellowmud's barry-site, which contains a messageboard entitled Strictly Critique, devoted to FZ and Free Speech in general. However...

:: Posted by Barry on 12/28/2000, 10:49 am
Those of you with a linguistic education know that it isn't always easy to take a quiz, if you haven't really mastered the language...
Out of this concern grew the idea to create a Multilanguage FZ Quiz that would procure trivia gratification to Zappa lovers on a world scale. So now, friends, fellow countrymen (look at me, I'm on a roll here), it is my pleasure to announce to you the YouCantEvenSpeakYourOwnf**kingLanguage quiz, which is currently on offer in the Barry-Quiz Department.
A carefully chosen array of questions is now awaiting you there, in either Dutch, French, Spanish, German or Japanese flavors. (Turkish is coming soon, courtesy of Isik Who Runs The Weasel Club).
On an off note here, I wish to apologize for the consistent censoring of the word f - u - c - k - in this forum. I suggest you write to the good folks at boardhost and ask why "f-u-c-k" should be censored, when "vaccuum cleaner" seems to pose no problem.

:: Posted by effzee on 12/28/2000, 11:41 am, in reply.
Hi Barry,
There's some sort of kiddie filter turned on. Maybe you can get rid of it? I'm sure kids today could teach us all a few things about swear words...
Would it be tacky to call it the "You Can Even Speak... " instead of "You Can't..."? Just a thought (they happen sometimes, and then I like to share them with people).
effzee

:: Posted by Barry on 12/28/2000, 11:49 am, in reply.
It would be tacky. Very much so...
And I have disposed of every webmaster's tool at the site; from daily posting logs to editing posts, to IP-banning to password protection. But, they won't allow me to have the word f-u-c-k displayed the way it should be. My heart bleeds over this...
Thoughts happen to me also at times. Then I usually decide I need to cut down on my drinking... :-)
Barry
Sofa: I take it that friend of a friend of a friend of a friend who's a Russian/English translator, is unavailable at the moment?

:: Posted by SOFA on 12/28/2000, 8:05 pm, in reply.
*Sofa: I take it that friend of a friend of a friend of a friend who's a Russian/English translator, is unavailable at the moment?*
I guess fahking so; I don't really fooking know. But I wish they'd get off their fucching dead ars and finish the gottendammen son-of-a-puss-infested-gutter-snipe-bich. I mean, what the faak?
SOFA
PS I found, in writing this response, that the word bitch is censored too. I wonder if there are more?

:: Posted by Barry on 12/28/2000, 8:14 pm, in reply.
There's a f-u-c-k hidden in there somewhere...

:: Posted by SOFA on 12/28/2000, 10:15 pm, in reply.
*There's a f-u-c-k hidden in there somewhere... *
With your kind permission, Barry, I'd like to execute a little test to see just how proscriptive our "censor" is.
Historically in mass media, there've been 7 words that you could not broadcast over the airwaves. Those words were shit, piss, f##k, cunt, cocksucker, motherf##ker, & tits. As we can see, the standards have been changed - new boundaries have been set - for the Internet. And this leaves us with a problem. One of our hero's most quotable words is going to be censored by this site (beyond Barry's control)...
Barry has made a very good suggestion with f-u-c-k, but I'd like to suggest an alternative. Why not use the word "love" in f-u-c-k's place. FZ always said that "love" song lyrics were bad for your mental health and we'd all be better off saying what we really mean. But then we don't have to mean what we say... I think FZ would understand - and approve.
So why not turn the tables completely and say love when we mean f-u-c-k? Think of it... "Love YOU buddy, and the lovin' horse you rode in on", or "You stupid motherlover"! Have you lost your lovin' mind!" would dominate - AND be fully printable... If we united in this cause, we might even begin to create a new web language!
Love with us, will they?
Heh-heh,
SOFA

:: Posted by Barry on 12/29/2000, 8:53 am, in reply.
An excellent suggestion my be-f-u-c-k-ed Sofa!
Barry

:: Posted by SOFA on 12/29/2000, 9:39 am, in reply.
*An excellent suggestion my be-f-u-c-k-ed Sofa! *
Ooooh, this is exciting! It could be the start of something really big! Why, I fondly remember the summer of 1970 when I organized a peace march in my hometown. I actually got 50 people together and we went down to the local Induction Center, and sang a bar from Alice's Restaurant in 4-part harmony and full orchestration - in the hope of convincing them we were an actual local "movement", just like Arlo said.
No one paid the least bit of attention to us...
After all these years, I'm willing to try again.
SOFA
PS "Love you, if you don't like my hat!"