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Who Did What Blurb
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Rhymin' Man
Due to the great consternation
caused by the revelation
of my act of procreation,
I accept my obligation
to give an explanation
to the population
for my act of copulation.
I gave in to temptation,
for the anticipation
of sexual gratification,
that I could not obtain through masturbation,
resulted in my fornication.
I accepted her invitation,
and provided her with excitation,
stimulation,
penetration, replication,
and liberation.
She provided lubrication
(to avoid inflammation)
and I wore condoms to avoid contamination.
She cried for duplication,
but I insisted upon termination,
in spite of her fascination with variation.
This has caused me great aggravation,
and the agitation and provocation
of the media has resulted in my humiliation,
denigration, and degradation.
My wife is considering castration,
which would require my hospitalization.
Pray that this matter will find culmination
in my sanctification
and rehabilitation,
so that my plans for nomination
to my ultimate vocation
will not result in revocation and termination.
I hope this proclamation
has provided illumination and verification,
and will prohibit further provocation.
The Rev. Jesse Jackson |
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